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Wednesday, March 17, 2004

Lazy entry 

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Nothing I would think or hope to expect came close to what my first practice at the shala this morning was like. Just, crazy. They let me go through the Series!!! I kept thinking a voice would ring out, stopping me, that I am rushing and maybe they are busy and not seeing me but apparently things were ok, bindable mari d but not supta k and badha k with a little help from sharath but I just kep going and going and stopped for backbending at setu b and told sharath, when he came over, "finished", question mark very much implicit in my tone. He nodded. Hm. That is a full practice- so much for the adjusting period. The energy in that room is crazy, 10 times what Eddie's is and that place is intense.

Had a bit of a magical Guruji moment. As I stayed in Kurmasana, he was one mat over backbending a lady so he came over. I completely relaxed and surrendered- there is no room for fear, here, not even in an pose I have hurt myself in. So he crosses my ankles somewhere over my head then intones "TAKE IT UP" with the kind of authority the little voices of doubt and fear can do nothing against (this being the exact moment I tore a ligament in my collarbone in, a few months back, and have been wussing out of doing anything but a weak exit out of the pose since). Without a thought or moment of doubt I inhale up and exhale back to chatwari, like there is someone else moving me. "GOOD", he says, and we smile at each other as I look up at him from updog. Crazy.

Am desperately apartment hunting since I don't want to spend more than a week with the Indian lady I am staying with since her prices are inflated (though less than a hotel) and I really want to start settling down. Most of the stuff available is hugely inflated, but 3500/mo per person seems about average; like in NYC there's some really crappy stuff out there for a lot of money.

Have completely lost my voice; plagued by a cold or the pollution or stress or too much/tooloud talking and bargaining with indians who try to charge me western prices. Or all of the above. It is not too hot at all, now. People who are here are mostly settled into their grooves, and while I find my feet I am looking forward to finding some folks to hang with and explore my own groove.

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